Heard the funeral is going to be an all ticket affair as so many people want to go.
The tickets will only cost a tenor!!!
The tickets will only cost a tenor!!!
The Joke Thread..........
08-09-07, 04:25 PM
#287
I wonder how many people it will take to carry his coffin?
Tenor 12????????
lol
xx
Tenor 12????????
lol
xx
"IF THE SHOE FITS - BUY IT IN EVERY COLOUR!!!!!"
08-09-07, 05:32 PM
#288
camnic1972 Wrote:I wonder how many people it will take to carry his coffin?
Tenor 12????????
Whahahahaha
I grew up to become a screw up...
11-09-07, 10:08 PM
#289
A farmer in Devon has successfully grown a field of dildos, unfortunately he's having terrible trouble with squatters...
(hope this doesn't offend anyone...)
Renault have just designed a people carrier so spacious, so comfortable and so luxurious that you can hardly notice that the kids are in the back. They have called it the Renault McCann...
ouch...
(hope this doesn't offend anyone...)
Renault have just designed a people carrier so spacious, so comfortable and so luxurious that you can hardly notice that the kids are in the back. They have called it the Renault McCann...
ouch...
" shocking cock-up, the mice were furious "
12-09-07, 09:21 AM
#290
Well if Steak can get away with it..... 
Whats worse than than letting Michael Jackson baby sit your kids?
Letting the McCann's take them on holidays.
Whats worse than than letting Michael Jackson baby sit your kids?
Letting the McCann's take them on holidays.
14-09-07, 12:48 PM
#291
Wrong, so wrong!!!!!
But bloody funny!!!!!!
Lol
xx
But bloody funny!!!!!!
Lol
xx
"IF THE SHOE FITS - BUY IT IN EVERY COLOUR!!!!!"
25-09-07, 04:53 PM
#292
Jose mourinho says he is going back to portugal and never wants to be seen in england again....
he's speaking with the McCanns!
he's speaking with the McCanns!
Oh what a feelin! When you're dunking, on the ceilin!
08-10-07, 10:33 PM
#293
Why did the architect have his house made backwards?
So he could watch TV at the same time.
So he could watch TV at the same time.
08-10-07, 10:35 PM
#294
When I die I want to pass away like my Uncle, nice and peaceful in his sleep.
Not shouting and screaming like his passengers.
Not shouting and screaming like his passengers.
08-10-07, 10:41 PM
#295
A woman is paying for her groceries. She pays for some bacon, some eggs and some milk.
A man behind her says, 'Ah, you must be single'.
The woman looks at the man, then at the groceries and says 'Yes, but how did you know'?
The man replies, 'Because your f**king ugly'.
A man behind her says, 'Ah, you must be single'.
The woman looks at the man, then at the groceries and says 'Yes, but how did you know'?
The man replies, 'Because your f**king ugly'.
17-12-07, 07:29 PM
#296
This one is rude but very funny!!
An 80 year old couple were seen having furious mad sex up against a fence.
For 40 mins they were at it like mad!!!
Arms and legs were going absoloutley everywhere!!!!
Until, they fall to the floor!!!
"Bloomin Eck!" she says, "you didn't do that to me 50 years ago!!!!!"
To which he replies,
"50 years ago Pet, that bloody fence wasn't electric!!!!!"
An 80 year old couple were seen having furious mad sex up against a fence.
For 40 mins they were at it like mad!!!
Arms and legs were going absoloutley everywhere!!!!
Until, they fall to the floor!!!
"Bloomin Eck!" she says, "you didn't do that to me 50 years ago!!!!!"
To which he replies,
"50 years ago Pet, that bloody fence wasn't electric!!!!!"
"IF THE SHOE FITS - BUY IT IN EVERY COLOUR!!!!!"
17-12-07, 09:32 PM
#297
Suburban Knight Wrote:Three men who were lost in the forest were captured by cannibals. The cannibal king told the prisoners that they could live if they pass a trial. The first step of the trial was to go to the forest and get ten pieces of the same kind of fruit. So all three men went separate ways to gather fruits.
The first one came back and said to the king, "I brought ten apples." The king then explained the trial to him. "You have to shove the fruits up your butt without any expression on your face or you'll be eaten."
The first apple went in... but on the second one he winced out in pain, so he was killed.
The second one arrived and showed the king ten berries. When the king explained the trial to him he thought to himself that this should be easy. 1...2...3...4...5...6...7...8... and on the ninth berry he burst out in laughter and was killed.
The first guy and the second guy met in heaven. The first one asked, "Why did you laugh, you almost got away with it?" The second one replied, "I couldn't help it, I saw the third guy coming with pineapples."
LMAO i rarely laugh out loud to jokes on the internet or irl but that was hilarious IMO cus its exactly what i am like.. when i have to talk to someone important or be quiet i cant stop thinking of funny things and just start laughing lool
18-12-07, 08:56 AM
#298
A man asks his wife " luv can i cum in your ear??" the wife replies " ewwwwwwww no you might make me deaf"
To which the man answers "Well you let me cum in ya mouth and you aint f**king mute are ya"
To which the man answers "Well you let me cum in ya mouth and you aint f**king mute are ya"
It's not the size of the feet!!it's the amount of quality on em
20-12-07, 01:54 AM
#299
What did he left testicle say to the right testicle?
I dunno, but they were both talking bollocks.
I dunno, but they were both talking bollocks.
Boo.
20-12-07, 05:29 PM
#300
85% of scousers admit to having sex in the shower
The other 15% havent been in prison yet.
The other 15% havent been in prison yet.
Oh what a feelin! When you're dunking, on the ceilin!
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