The following warnings occurred:
Warning [2] Undefined array key "extra" - Line: 100 - File: inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php 100 errorHandler->error
/inc/plugins/google_seo.php 311 require_once
/inc/class_plugins.php 38 require_once
/inc/init.php 239 pluginSystem->load
/global.php 20 require_once
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined array key "google_seo_thread" - Line: 1127 - File: inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php 1127 errorHandler->error
/inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php 173 google_seo_url_hook
/inc/plugins/google_seo.php 311 require_once
/inc/class_plugins.php 38 require_once
/inc/init.php 239 pluginSystem->load
/global.php 20 require_once
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined array key 1 - Line: 255 - File: inc/plugins/google_seo.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/plugins/google_seo.php 255 errorHandler->error
/inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php 1079 google_seo_dynamic
/inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php 1127 google_seo_url_dynamic
/inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php 173 google_seo_url_hook
/inc/plugins/google_seo.php 311 require_once
/inc/class_plugins.php 38 require_once
/inc/init.php 239 pluginSystem->load
/global.php 20 require_once
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined array key "parent" - Line: 446 - File: inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php 446 errorHandler->error
/inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php 1143 google_seo_url_create
/inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php 173 google_seo_url_hook
/inc/plugins/google_seo.php 311 require_once
/inc/class_plugins.php 38 require_once
/inc/init.php 239 pluginSystem->load
/global.php 20 require_once
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined variable $location - Line: 1249 - File: inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php 1249 errorHandler->error
/inc/plugins/google_seo/url.php 173 google_seo_url_hook
/inc/plugins/google_seo.php 311 require_once
/inc/class_plugins.php 38 require_once
/inc/init.php 239 pluginSystem->load
/global.php 20 require_once
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined array key "lockoutexpiry" - Line: 94 - File: global.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php 94 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Trying to access array offset on value of type null - Line: 192 - File: inc/plugins/google_seo.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/plugins/google_seo.php 192 errorHandler->error
/inc/plugins/google_seo/redirect.php 117 google_seo_tid
/inc/class_plugins.php 142 google_seo_redirect_hook
/global.php 100 pluginSystem->run_hooks
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined array key "lockoutexpiry" - Line: 568 - File: global.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php 568 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined variable $username - Line: 23 - File: global.php(584) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php(584) : eval()'d code 23 errorHandler->error
/global.php 584 eval
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined variable $password - Line: 25 - File: global.php(584) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php(584) : eval()'d code 25 errorHandler->error
/global.php 584 eval
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined variable $redirect_url - Line: 38 - File: global.php(584) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php(584) : eval()'d code 38 errorHandler->error
/global.php 584 eval
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined variable $username - Line: 58 - File: global.php(584) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php(584) : eval()'d code 58 errorHandler->error
/global.php 584 eval
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined variable $user - Line: 84 - File: global.php(584) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php(584) : eval()'d code 84 errorHandler->error
/global.php 584 eval
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Trying to access array offset on value of type null - Line: 84 - File: global.php(584) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php(584) : eval()'d code 84 errorHandler->error
/global.php 584 eval
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined variable $code - Line: 86 - File: global.php(584) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php(584) : eval()'d code 86 errorHandler->error
/global.php 584 eval
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined variable $can_access_moderationqueue - Line: 744 - File: global.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php 744 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined array key "avatartype" - Line: 884 - File: global.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php 884 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined array key "avatartype" - Line: 884 - File: global.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php 884 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined variable $unreadreports - Line: 38 - File: global.php(951) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php(951) : eval()'d code 38 errorHandler->error
/global.php 951 eval
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined variable $awaitingusers - Line: 40 - File: global.php(951) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/global.php(951) : eval()'d code 40 errorHandler->error
/global.php 951 eval
/showthread.php 28 require_once
Warning [2] Undefined variable $jumpsel - Line: 5 - File: inc/functions.php(3007) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php(3007) : eval()'d code 5 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions.php 3007 eval
/showthread.php 661 build_forum_jump
Warning [2] Trying to access array offset on value of type null - Line: 5 - File: inc/functions.php(3007) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php(3007) : eval()'d code 5 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions.php 3007 eval
/showthread.php 661 build_forum_jump
Warning [2] Undefined property: MyLanguage::$forumjump_select - Line: 5 - File: inc/functions.php(3007) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php(3007) : eval()'d code 5 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions.php 3007 eval
/showthread.php 661 build_forum_jump
Warning [2] Undefined array key "mybb" - Line: 1997 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 1997 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_indicators.php 41 my_set_array_cookie
/showthread.php 669 mark_thread_read
Warning [2] Trying to access array offset on value of type null - Line: 488 - File: inc/db_mysqli.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/db_mysqli.php 488 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 762 DB_MySQLi->fetch_field
Warning [2] Undefined property: MyLanguage::$ratings_update_error - Line: 5 - File: showthread.php(772) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/showthread.php(772) : eval()'d code 5 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 772 eval
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key 464 - Line: 249 - File: inc/plugins/thx.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/plugins/thx.php 249 errorHandler->error
/inc/class_plugins.php 142 thx
/inc/functions_post.php 842 pluginSystem->run_hooks
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key 56 - Line: 249 - File: inc/plugins/thx.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/plugins/thx.php 249 errorHandler->error
/inc/class_plugins.php 142 thx
/inc/functions_post.php 842 pluginSystem->run_hooks
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key 765 - Line: 249 - File: inc/plugins/thx.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/plugins/thx.php 249 errorHandler->error
/inc/class_plugins.php 142 thx
/inc/functions_post.php 842 pluginSystem->run_hooks
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key 772 - Line: 249 - File: inc/plugins/thx.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/plugins/thx.php 249 errorHandler->error
/inc/class_plugins.php 142 thx
/inc/functions_post.php 842 pluginSystem->run_hooks
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "" - Line: 1336 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 1336 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 203 usergroup_displaygroup
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Trying to access array offset on value of type null - Line: 1340 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 1340 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 203 usergroup_displaygroup
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Trying to access array offset on value of type null - Line: 1340 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 1340 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 203 usergroup_displaygroup
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Trying to access array offset on value of type null - Line: 1340 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 1340 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 203 usergroup_displaygroup
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Trying to access array offset on value of type null - Line: 1340 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 1340 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 203 usergroup_displaygroup
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Trying to access array offset on value of type null - Line: 1340 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 1340 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 203 usergroup_displaygroup
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Trying to access array offset on value of type null - Line: 1340 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 1340 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 203 usergroup_displaygroup
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Trying to access array offset on value of type null - Line: 1340 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 1340 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 203 usergroup_displaygroup
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "useravatar" - Line: 28 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 28 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "userstars" - Line: 36 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 36 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key 702 - Line: 249 - File: inc/plugins/thx.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/plugins/thx.php 249 errorHandler->error
/inc/class_plugins.php 142 thx
/inc/functions_post.php 842 pluginSystem->run_hooks
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key 1 - Line: 866 - File: inc/class_parser.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/class_parser.php 866 errorHandler->error
/inc/class_parser.php 938 postParser->mycode_parse_post_quotes
[PHP]   postParser->mycode_parse_post_quotes_callback1
/inc/class_parser.php 816 preg_replace_callback
/inc/class_parser.php 451 postParser->mycode_parse_quotes
/inc/class_parser.php 201 postParser->parse_mycode
/inc/functions_post.php 774 postParser->parse_message
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key 1 - Line: 885 - File: inc/class_parser.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/class_parser.php 885 errorHandler->error
/inc/class_parser.php 938 postParser->mycode_parse_post_quotes
[PHP]   postParser->mycode_parse_post_quotes_callback1
/inc/class_parser.php 816 preg_replace_callback
/inc/class_parser.php 451 postParser->mycode_parse_quotes
/inc/class_parser.php 201 postParser->parse_mycode
/inc/functions_post.php 774 postParser->parse_message
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key 1 - Line: 866 - File: inc/class_parser.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/class_parser.php 866 errorHandler->error
/inc/class_parser.php 938 postParser->mycode_parse_post_quotes
[PHP]   postParser->mycode_parse_post_quotes_callback1
/inc/class_parser.php 816 preg_replace_callback
/inc/class_parser.php 451 postParser->mycode_parse_quotes
/inc/class_parser.php 201 postParser->parse_mycode
/inc/functions_post.php 774 postParser->parse_message
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key 1 - Line: 885 - File: inc/class_parser.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/class_parser.php 885 errorHandler->error
/inc/class_parser.php 938 postParser->mycode_parse_post_quotes
[PHP]   postParser->mycode_parse_post_quotes_callback1
/inc/class_parser.php 816 preg_replace_callback
/inc/class_parser.php 451 postParser->mycode_parse_quotes
/inc/class_parser.php 201 postParser->parse_mycode
/inc/functions_post.php 774 postParser->parse_message
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "additionalgroups" - Line: 7360 - File: inc/functions.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions.php 7360 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_user.php 816 is_member
/inc/functions_post.php 416 purgespammer_show
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "profilefield" - Line: 8 - File: inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(484) : eval()'d code 8 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 484 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "canonlyreplyownthreads" - Line: 672 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 672 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 757 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 757 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showvideos" - Line: 762 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 762 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "showimages" - Line: 800 - File: inc/functions_post.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php 800 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "posttime" - Line: 18 - File: inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/inc/functions_post.php(895) : eval()'d code 18 errorHandler->error
/inc/functions_post.php 895 eval
/showthread.php 1124 build_postbit
Warning [2] Undefined array key "invisible" - Line: 1565 - File: showthread.php PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/showthread.php 1565 errorHandler->error
Warning [2] Undefined variable $threadnotesbox - Line: 90 - File: showthread.php(1597) : eval()'d code PHP 8.2.26 (Linux)
File Line Function
/showthread.php(1597) : eval()'d code 90 errorHandler->error
/showthread.php 1597 eval



#Login Register
The Joke Thread..........
  • 1 Vote(s) - 5 Average


12-07-07, 05:37 PM #226
Sooper Special Lover *****
Status: Offline Posts:1,940 Threads:5 Joined:Jan 2007 Reputation: 9
Yeah where are all these so called kids then? I thought we were mostly adults on here?
Bloody Kids!

Dance wit the speaker 'till you hear it blow - Mr Rakim

12-07-07, 10:10 PM #227
streak now an admin.. apparently *******
Status: Offline Posts:8,433 Threads:182 Joined:Jan 2006 Reputation: 188
The swearing ain't the real issue sooper.. 'twas the racist jokes.. Confused

" shocking cock-up, the mice were furious "

12-07-07, 10:15 PM #228
adidasanth The adidas Hunter *****
Status: Offline Posts:1,841 Threads:72 Joined:May 2007 Reputation: 17
I must confess to being one of the people that put some 'unwelcome' jokes on here!!!

Soz if I offended, no offence meant!

www.rareadidas.com Sell Your Rarities Here
www.mrshoeshotta.com Best on the Internet
www.theadidashunter.co.uk Find those soops!

13-07-07, 04:05 PM #229
camnic1972 SSDB Member *****
Status: Offline Posts:1,497 Threads:36 Joined:May 2007 Reputation: 16
It depends what you define as racist?

I don't take offence at any Irish or Essex girl or blonde jokes - mind you I think its mainly me that puts them on here!!!

And I am an Irish/Essex blonde dippy bint!!!!

lol
xx

"IF THE SHOE FITS - BUY IT IN EVERY COLOUR!!!!!"



13-07-07, 04:23 PM #230
Sooper Special Lover *****
Status: Offline Posts:1,940 Threads:5 Joined:Jan 2007 Reputation: 9
I cant recall any racist jokes to be honest but then i just see a joke as a joke and nothing else, which is kinda the whole point of Jokes in my mind! Lets not get too pc i have enough of that at work!

Dance wit the speaker 'till you hear it blow - Mr Rakim

13-07-07, 05:47 PM #231
camnic1972 SSDB Member *****
Status: Offline Posts:1,497 Threads:36 Joined:May 2007 Reputation: 16
I think we all have enough of seriousness in everyday life!!!!

Fred and Mary have a special word for when they want to have sex, it's "washing machine"

One night they are both in bed and Fred turns to Mary and says,
"Washing machine?"
She replies,
"Oh not tonight Fred I have got an awful headache"

10 minutes later she is starting to feel really guilty at letting Fred down so she turns to him and says,
"Washing Machine"


To which Fred replies,

"Well love, it was only a small load so I did it by hand!"

"IF THE SHOE FITS - BUY IT IN EVERY COLOUR!!!!!"



Da Camden Ayatollah Show this Post
14-07-07, 11:14 PM #232
Da Camden Ayatollah Guest
 
I don't remember seeing any racist jokes. although a few of the jesus jokes will cause seroius offence to certain people who i know/live near/see around on my travels.

16-07-07, 04:13 AM #233
deftoned Stripes Junkie *****
Status: Offline Posts:1,243 Threads:20 Joined:Mar 2007 Reputation: 11
A woman and a man are involved in a car accident. It's a bad one.Both of their cars are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them are hurt.

After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, "So you're a man, that's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow! Just look at our cars, after this car accident ! There's nothing left, but fortunately, we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days."

The man replied, "I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God!"

The woman continued, "And look at this, here's another miracle...My car is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break.Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune."

Then, she hands the bottle to the man. The man shakes his head in agreement, opens it and drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"

The woman replies, "No, I think I'll just wait for the police..."

the boy with the three stripes

16-07-07, 04:13 AM #234
deftoned Stripes Junkie *****
Status: Offline Posts:1,243 Threads:20 Joined:Mar 2007 Reputation: 11
A man joined a big Multi National Company as a trainee.....

On his first day, he dialled the kitchen and shouted into the phone:
"Get me a cup of coffee, quickly!"

The voice from the other side responded:
"You fool; you've dialled the wrong extension, do you know who you're talking to?"

"No" replied the trainee.
"It's the Managing Director of the company, you idiot!"

Trainee shouted back: "And do you know who YOU are talking to, you IDIOT?"
"No!" replied the Managing Director angrily.

"Thank God!" replied the trainee and put down the phone .....

the boy with the three stripes

16-07-07, 04:28 AM #235
deftoned Stripes Junkie *****
Status: Offline Posts:1,243 Threads:20 Joined:Mar 2007 Reputation: 11
A single guy decides life would be more fun if he had a pet. He went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet.

After some discussion, he finally bought a centipede (100-legged bug), which came in a little white box to use for its house. ...

He took the box back home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would
start off by taking his new pet to church with him.

He asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to go to church with me today? We
will have a good time." But there was no answer from his new pet.

This bothered him a bit, so he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, "How about going to church with me and receive blessings?"

But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet. He waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation. ...

He decided to ask him one more time. This time putting his face up against the centipede's house and shouting, "Hey, in there! Would you like to go to church with me and learn about the Lord?"

A little teeny voice came out of the box... "I heard you the firsttime! I'm putting on my shoes." ...

the boy with the three stripes

16-07-07, 04:32 AM #236
deftoned Stripes Junkie *****
Status: Offline Posts:1,243 Threads:20 Joined:Mar 2007 Reputation: 11
A Licensed Counselor was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children... "You all have obsessions," he observed.

To the first mother, he said, "You are obsessed with eating. You've even named your daughter Candy."

He turned to the second Mom. "Your obsession is with money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny."

He turns to the third Mom. "Your obsession is alcohol. This too manifests itself in your child's name, Brandy."

At this point, the fourth mother gets up, takes her little boy by the hand and whispers, "Come on, Dick, we're leaving

the boy with the three stripes

16-07-07, 04:34 AM #237
deftoned Stripes Junkie *****
Status: Offline Posts:1,243 Threads:20 Joined:Mar 2007 Reputation: 11
A very successful lawyer parked his brand-new Lexus in front of his office, ready to show it off to his colleagues. As he got out, a truck passed too close and completely tore off the door on the driver's side. The lawyer immediately grabbed his cell phone, dialed 911, and within minutes a policeman pulled up. Before the officer had a chance to ask any questions, the lawyer started screaming hysterically. His Lexus, which he had just picked up the day before, was now completely ruined and would never be the same, no matter what the body shop did to it.

When the lawyer finally wound down from his ranting and raving, the officer shook his head in and disbelief... "I can't believe how materialistic you lawyers are," he said. "You are so focused on your possessions that you don't notice anything else."

"How can you say such a thing?" asked the lawyer.

The cop replied, "Don't you know that your left arm is missing from the elbow down? It must have been torn off when the truck hit you."

"Oh my God!" screamed the lawyer. "Where's my Rolex?"

the boy with the three stripes

16-07-07, 11:47 AM #238
camnic1972 SSDB Member *****
Status: Offline Posts:1,497 Threads:36 Joined:May 2007 Reputation: 16
Very, very funny deftoned - loving them jokes!!!

"IF THE SHOE FITS - BUY IT IN EVERY COLOUR!!!!!"



16-07-07, 12:10 PM #239
streak now an admin.. apparently *******
Status: Offline Posts:8,433 Threads:182 Joined:Jan 2006 Reputation: 188
deftoned Wrote:A single guy decides life would be more fun if he had a pet. He went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet.

After some discussion, he finally bought a centipede (100-legged bug), which came in a little white box to use for its house. ...

He took the box back home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would
start off by taking his new pet to church with him.

He asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to go to church with me today? We
will have a good time." But there was no answer from his new pet.

This bothered him a bit, so he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, "How about going to church with me and receive blessings?"

But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet. He waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation. ...

He decided to ask him one more time. This time putting his face up against the centipede's house and shouting, "Hey, in there! Would you like to go to church with me and learn about the Lord?"

A little teeny voice came out of the box... "I heard you the firsttime! I'm putting on my shoes." ...

Daja vu....

Suburban Knight Wrote:A bloke sees an advert in a pet shop window, TALKING CENTIPEDE FOR SALE, ONLY £1000.
He thinks I'll have some of that and buys the little fella and takes him home in its box.
When he arrives home he opens up the box and asks if the centipede would like to go for a pint, but there's no answer.
So he asks again, still no answer.
Getting really angry because he's beginning to think he's been conned he shouts at the top of his voice,
'DO YOU WANT TO GO FOR A PINT?????, at which the centipede sticks his head over the side of the box and says,
I heard you the first time, I was putting my fuckin' shoes on!!

Confused Confused

" shocking cock-up, the mice were furious "

16-07-07, 12:16 PM #240
camnic1972 SSDB Member *****
Status: Offline Posts:1,497 Threads:36 Joined:May 2007 Reputation: 16
Never mind Streak, some people just can't be arsed with reading the whole thread!
I am always guilty of that!!!
lol
xx

"IF THE SHOE FITS - BUY IT IN EVERY COLOUR!!!!!"








Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread:
5 Guest(s)